Friday, October 17, 2014

Dynamics of Temptation

Read 2 Samuel 11:1-4

In a very familiar story, David falls into temptation, sins with Bathsheba, then compounds it in an attempt to cover it all up.  But how did he get there? What warnings did he ignore that led to such a great fall? Yes, it is David’s story. It is also ours. We too fall into temptation because we ignore all the warnings.  Are we even aware of what those warnings are? Let’s break down David’s fall and identify twelve warnings that will help us avoid falling.  It really is optional. 

Then it happened in the spring, at the time when kings go out to battle, that David sent Joab and his servants with him and all Israel, and they destroyed the sons of Ammon and besieged Rabbah. But David stayed at Jerusalem.  2 Samuel 11:1

We are not very far removed from the days when life and schedules were anchored in the agricultural rotation of seasons: a time to plant and a time to harvest.  Everything was geared accordingly, even when children went to school. Go back farther and add to that a season for war. Once the seeds were in the ground, then troops were sent out to defend or expand the kingdoms. There literally was “a time for war and a time for peace.” (Ecclesiastes 3:8) That was life. Going off to a season of war was expected, with only a few exceptions. Young men were given one year off when they got married to establish their homes and families. Obviously the aged and injured were exempt.  This is one of the radical changes that the Roman Empire brought about as it conquered the known world. But at the time of David, it was expected that every abled man went to war, including the king.

The quickest way to fall into temptation is not being where you ought to be or doing what you should be doing.   David sent Joab off to finish dealing with Hanun and the Ammonites; he went back to bed.

Now when evening came David arose from his bed … 2 Samuel 11:2

We can read in the Psalms times where David gave into depression and soaked his bed with tears.

I am weary with my sighing; every night I make my bed swim, I dissolve my couch with my tears.  Psalm 6:6

Later he will have a good reason for being depressed, but there is no indication that is the situation at this time. We also associate staying in bed all day with utter exhaustion. Again there is no indication that is the situation.  David went back to bed simply because he thought he could. He decided that there was no need for him to go to war with his men “this time.”

Why did David decide he didn’t need to go “this time?”  The answer in this question begins back in 2 Samuel 10:19.

When all the kings, servants of Hadadezer, saw that they were defeated by Israel, they made peace with Israel and served them. So the Arameans feared to help the sons of Ammon anymore.  2 Samuel 10:19

The more powerful Arameans had been defeated. Hadadezer’s war machine and the powerful Aramean alliance had been neutralized.  A peace agreement was signed, sealed and delivered. Victory often equals confidence, which can equal complacency. Complacency can easily distort our perspective.  When you have accomplished something significant or finally reached a hard fought goal, do you find yourself justifying complacency or “resting on your laurels”?  The dictionary defines the later as “to be so satisfied with what one has already achieved that one makes no further effort.” When we’ve accomplished something “big” it is easy to compare other things to it and decide it is “small” or less significant, thus given less attention or effort.  Comparisons often lead to making wrong choices. In those situations where we conclude “this is less than that,” it is easy to dismiss our need to partner with God. When comparisons are used to justify willful choices, we are setting ourselves up for trouble. 

The Arameans had been a big threat, but the Ammonites were now “just them.” It was easy to justify staying home and letting Joab handle it. Then it happened in the spring, at the time when kings go out to battle … David stayed in Jerusalem” and went back to bed!

·      Warning #1: We are just one simple justification away from falling into temptation.

David was not where he was supposed to be or doing what he should be doing simply because he justified staying home.  How hard is it for you to justify doing what you want to do? 

A temptation is only a temptation because the desire is already there.  The dictionary defines temptation as “a desire to do something wrong or unwise.”  The problem with this definition is that the desire may or may not be wrong. The temptation may be in how that desire is met. 

When Jesus was tempted by the devil his desires were pure:
  • Food – He had been fasting for 40 days and nights.
  • The establishment of His kingdom on earth as it was in heaven.
  • Universal acceptance of all He truly is.

After 40 days of intense and intimate interaction with the Father (the true purpose of fasting), His spirit was strong and willing, but His flesh was weak. (Matthew 26:41/Mark 14:38)  Satan, ever watchful for an opportunity to take advantage pounced (Luke 4:13) offered shortcuts, justifications and compromises that appealed to Jesus’ c’s: comfort, convenience, control, minimized cost and crowns.  These were the temptations.

When the desire is not good, it isn’t hard to justify doing what we want to do. When the desire is good, it isn’t all that hard to justify shortcuts. What are some of the things you tell yourself to justify willfulness?

As children of God, we are recipients of an abundance of grace, but it can be abused. Why do we justify driving 65 when the speed limit is 60 or 30 when its 25?  Because we know there is a 5 mph leeway of grace.  Is intentionally driving in that provision of grace an abuse of grace? How does justifying willfulness abuse grace?  We can even quote Scriptures to support our abuse!  Some of the ones often abused are 1 John 1:9; 1 Timothy 6:17; Romans 8:1; 1 Corinthians 6:12 and 10:23.

We need to remember that when Satan attempted to tempt Jesus, he abused Scripture to justify Jesus doing what he wanted. (See Matthew4:5,6.)

One justification leads to another.  We justify our justification. What is the extent we are willing to go in order to justify our willfulness? To the point of questioning or even blaming God? For example: Why did You let this happen when You knew I would fail? If God hadn’t made me this way, I wouldn’t be tempted to …?

[God speaking.] “Would you discredit my justice? Would you condemn me to justify yourself? Job 40:8 NIV

Let no one say when he is tempted, “I am being tempted by God”; for God cannot be tempted by evil, and He Himself does not tempt anyone.  James 1:13

Where do our justifications usually lead us?  It may look as innocent as back to bed, but truly it is to the brink of temptation, if not all the way off the deep end.

Eventually David had to get out of bed. A nice stroll around the roof sounded like a good idea.  Up there he had a great vantage point of the City of David.  Why not be reminded about all that was his as king? There is something incredibly restorative about a simple walk spent counting your blessings. But blessings that are not promptly turned into praise will quickly become pride.

There was nothing wrong with David strolling around on his roof, except for the fact that he wasn’t supposed to there to begin with. Where would he most likely be reminded about the blessings and responsibilities as a king: from his rooftop or from the trenches with his men? 

·      Warning #2: As soon as we set ourselves apart and above others we are asking for trouble.

When are you most susceptible to temptation: when with others or when off by yourself? There are some that are extremely vulnerable to peer pressure or group dynamics, and would say, do, even think in ways they might not if they were alone. For others or in other situations, we are most vulnerable when we think no one knows or cares. We not only forget about the presence of God, but also the unseen presence of our stalking enemy seeking an opportunity to attack. See 1 Peter 5:8

We don’t know what David was thinking when he walked around his roof, but we do know what caught his eye.

Now when evening came David arose from his bed and walked around on the roof of the king’s house, and from the roof he saw a woman bathing; and the woman was very beautiful in appearance.  2 Samuel 11:2

I don’t know if bathing on a roof was common, but why not enjoy a little personal indulgence. Maybe their home was a little higher than others in this tiered city, offering her a bit more assurance of privacy. Her husband, one of David’s might man (2 Samuel 23:39) and a valiant professional soldier was off to war along with ALL the other men (or at least they were supposed to be).  Did she know David didn’t go to war as expected? I don’t know.  I do know that David lingered long enough to notice that “the woman was very beautiful.”

·      Warning #3:  You linger, you lose!

Innocently we can be at the wrong place at the wrong time. Sometimes, like David, we are at the wrong place at the wrong time because of wrong choices previously made. Regardless, at that moment and in that situation, we see something we shouldn’t see or hear something we have no business hearing. At that moment of awareness, we have to make a choice: leave or linger.
·      Conversation turns to gossip: leave or linger?
·      Graphics in the movie become risqué: leave or linger?
·      TV shows humor is ungodly: leave or linger?
·      “Experts” stand in direct conflict to Biblical teaching: leave or linger?
·      Catch someone in a compromising situation: leave or linger?
·      Something you want, but shouldn’t have is right there: leave or linger?

At that moment when David’s eye caught a woman bathing, what should he have done: leave or linger? 

But flee from these things, you man of God, and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, perseverance and gentleness.  1 Timothy 6:11

Now flee from youthful lusts and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.  2 Timothy 2:22

Is it really that hard?  The answer is yes!  They are temptations because they appeal to a very real part of our humanity.  

There are three very specific areas of temptation recapped in 1 John 2:16.

For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh and the lust of the eyes and the boastful pride of life, is not from the Father, but is from the world.  1 John 2:16

·      Lust of the flesh - what feels good. These are the dangling promises to satisfy or thrill. It may be as simple as promised comfort and peace or as exciting as an adrenaline rush.  It promises to satisfy a craving, provide happiness, or meet an emotional or physical need. These temptations most often appeal to one of our senses. I would include what promises to relieve stress.
·      Lust of the eyes - what looks good. This is about being attracted to the tantalizing, the outstanding, the best, the most beautiful, the promising, the unique, and sometimes even the dangerous. It is about the magnetic pull of what is appealing to us. The other side of this temptation is applying this to ourselves, with our being drawn to what we believe makes us appealing and/or behaviors that would attract attention to us.  
·      Lust of pride       - what makes good. This is the tantalizing promise to give  “me” worth, make sure “I” matter, and give me value. It pursues being noticed, appreciated, respected, and applauded.  Words like more, better, best, stronger, etc. all apply.  It shows up in both ends of extremes, for example getting the best deal or making the least amount of effort. Lure of being “est” = best, least, smallest, quickest, prettiest, richest, smartest ...

Practically everything that goes on in the world—wanting your own way, wanting everything for yourself, wanting to appear important—has nothing to do with the Father. It just isolates you from him. 1 John 1:16 MSG

That is Satan’s goal: “isolate you from Him.” He focuses in on these three zones of attack.  He always has.  Satan obviously has a very limited bag of tricks. He threw the same temptations at Eve in the Garden of Eden (Genesis 3:1-6). He threw them at Jesus in the Wilderness. (Matthew 4:1-11

How about you?  How are you tempted by what promises to (1) feel good, (2) what might make you look good or looks good to you, and (3) makes you good or give you value or worth? Are you aware of one or two of these areas where you feel especially susceptible? If you are aware of this vulnerability do you think your spiritual enemy is equally aware?  He knows if you are weakest alone or in a crowd. He knows just where to aim his attacks to be the most successful. He is not going to waste his fiery arrows where it won’t be effective. 

Let’s turn our questions on David. Which area do you feel David was most susceptible? Can one temptation hit all areas of temptation at the same time?  Do you think David was aware of his susceptibility? What difference should awareness make? Awareness should lead to shoring up those weaknesses with armor, accountability and avoidance where avoidable.

Unlike Eve, David and most often ourselves physically leaving was not an option for Jesus. It wasn’t a matter of His being in the wrong place at the wrong time. It was intentional. “Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil.”  It was about glory and grace. Jesus had to hang around and face it all head on for our sake.  He did so without sin. 

Are you ever faced with temptations that do not come with the option of leaving, you are forced with only two options: face head on or fall?  

No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it.  1 Corinthians 10:13

Note several very important facts listed in this verse:
1.    You aren’t the only one ever to face this temptation. It is common to man. “Only you” is a part of Warning #2 and is a lie.
2.    God knows your limits.  Trust His assessment of you. If you are facing this temptation, He knows together you can face it victoriously.
3.    He provides a “way of escape” - ekbasis - literally going out or through. The emphasis is not where or what we are coming out of, but where we are going. The first definition given in the Bible Dictionary of ekbasis is “an egress” – “a direct means of access.” His direct means of access is to the "righteousness, godliness, faith, love, perseverance and gentleness" (1 Timothy 6:11) and "righteousness, faith, love and peace” (2 Timothy 2:22) He intends for us.
4.    The purpose is endurance – the ability to stand up, stand against, stand still and, if necessary, run.

Going back to 1 Timothy 6:11 and 2 Timothy 2:22, we are not only told to flee from these temptations, but (1) flee towards righteousness, godliness, faith, love, perseverance, gentleness and peace (these should all sound very familiar as they are fruits of the Spirit); and (2) “with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart”  - in partnership with others who are living in partnership with God.  Strength and wisdom to flee temptations needs godly partners who encourage us as well as keep us accountable.

David had a way out: the door. Why do you think he lingered?

When we intentionally linger, lust has an opportunity to take hold.

But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust. James 1:14

Lust takes hold when the focus lingers on the possibility. Lust is desire without restraint, pleasure without boundaries, passions without regards to consequences, willfulness without remorse. Lust is simply wanting what we want. What is alluring for one person is different from what might tempt someone else.  The fact that you are not tempted by something does not make you superior. The promise is that God “will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able” to endure in partnership with Him. (1 Corinthians 10:13)  If you are not tempted in one area or another, it is because God knows you can’t handle it.

When we don’t flee (even if only into the protecting presence and power of Christ), lust takes root and takes on a life of its own.

Then when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death.  James 1:15

Lust gets pregnant, and has a baby: sin! Sin grows up to adulthood, and becomes a real killer.  James 1:15 MSG

Just like in pregnancy, conception is complete when it becomes secure in a protected, enabling environment.  When this possibility or promise of feeling good, looking good, and/or being good takes root in our mind, it begins to grow and take on shape as it is fed by justifications and strategizing.  Those lusts can quickly be aborted simply by taking those enticing thoughts captive to the obedience of Christ.  (2 Corinthians 10:5)

Unrestrained thoughts become unrestrained actions. Some “pregnancies” are very short! The result is “it gives birth to sin.” It leaves the hidden place of the mind and displays itself in visible or audible form.  It may live for a time as if it is actually delivering all that was promised, but soon its life-killing nature is revealed.  The word translated “death” – thanatos – actually means “to separate from that which enables life.” It separates us from God, from a life of meaning and purpose, from peace and passion. It always angles away from God and life as He intends.

We will follow this same progression (or rather digression) as David chose to linger instead of leave.  As he watched Bathsheba bathing, lust was being conceived. 

The world’s view is that since this was only in his head it is no big deal; no one has been hurt. James 1:15 can be twisted to support the argument that since it hasn’t given “birth to sin” YET, it really isn’t sin.  Is that true? When is it sin? The word translated “sin” is hamartia, which literally means to fall short of the target or goal. Romans 3:23 says what we fall short of is the glory of God.

When is it sin according to James 4:17?

Therefore, to one who knows the right thing to do and does not do it, to him it is sin.  James 4:17

This simply means that those in the know are accountable. Is there a different standard for Christians than for a non-Christian?  Once again the answer is yes and no.  Yes, because we have Christ’s example, God’s preserved word, and His empowering Spirit.   No, because what Satan told Eve was actually true, though it wasn’t the wonderful promise Satan purported it to be. We would know good and evil – good from evil. (Genesis 3:5) This meant that the gut instinct regarding right and wrong is now “woven into the very fabric of our creation.” (Romans 2:15 MSG)  Along with this instinctive knowledge of right and wrong comes conviction and guilt, as well as accountability. As parents, we know when our children know and must choose accordingly. You can actually watch a 6 month old know throwing her food off the high chair is wrong.

·      Warning #4: We are not as ignorant nor as innocent as we try to convince ourselves we are.

David choosing to linger to watch a beautiful woman bathe wasn’t all that innocent or harmless.

What is God’s opinion on this specific issue of his lingering? 

You have heard that it was said, ‘YOU SHALL NOT COMMIT ADULTERY’; but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.  Matthew 5:27,28

Even if just in the mind, it is falling short of God’s standard.  Everything God does, especially the standard He sets of what is right and wrong, holy and unholy, is for our sake (grace) and His glory. (See 1 Chronicles 17:19) When God sets a high standard and says “No,” He is protecting us.  One area He sets a really high standard is regarding sex. God knows that sinful choices in this specific area are actually sinning against our very own bodies – hurting us.

Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.  1 Corinthians 6:18-20 NIV

I love it when science proves God to be right.  It has been scientifically proven that sexual acts and images release bonding agents in the brain.  God’s created intent is to continually reinforce the bond between a husband and wife as they alone share this wonderful intimacy. Think of it as God’s superglue making two into one. This connection is physical, emotional, mental and even spiritual, as it involves our spirit, the core of who we are as a person. There is no such thing as a casual connection. Every time that bond is made, even if only in the imagination, self is bonded to that person. When that bond is severed, a piece of self is broken away. When someone willingly/willfully respond, a piece of him or herself is bonded to your life. When that connection is broken, pieces of them are always left behind. We can see how sexual immorality leaves a person with bits and pieces missing and bits and pieces added that don’t belong.

It is the release of these bonding agents - this powerful connection - that feeds the attraction, wants more and justifies taking the next step.

David’s next step was …

So David sent and inquired about the woman. 2 Samuel 11:3a

This was not simply calling a servant up to the rooftop and asking him if he knew who she was.  NIV puts it, “David sent someone to find out about her.”  (Actually from later in verse 3, the NASB translation indicates that David actually sent more than one person.) The word translated “inquired” or “find out” is daresh, which means to investigate thoroughly.  It is the investigative pursuit of information so plans can be made and actions carried out. It requires time, effort and resolve. David wanted to know everything about THAT woman.

He may have sent out his detective(s) that same evening or mulled it over in his head for days before deciding he had to know more about this beautiful woman.  The thing about daresh is that it is never impulsive. 

Would it be different if David had “simply” acted impulsively?  Is it easier to justify or be less critical of things you said or did impulsively?  Impulsiveness is very deceptive. Impulsiveness is one of Satan’s favorite and successful tricks. It is a lie, like so many of the other lies Satan tells. A lie is anything that stands in direct conflict with truth. What is the lie of impulsiveness? We deem ourselves “less” responsible for what we said or did because it wasn’t “premeditated.”  We confuse “impulsive” with “unintentional.”

Reading the Old Testament law, provisions were made for unintentional sin: unintentionally take something you didn’t know belonged to some one else; an accident where someone is unintentionally injured or killed; or unintentionally eat something on the do not eat list, etc.  Being impulsive does not fall under the category of unintentional. It becomes intentional when we choose to be impulsive.

The dictionary defines impulsive as what is done without forethought. There is a thought; it just isn’t thought through.  Impulsive is about control and doing what we want to do before anyone, including ourselves, tells us we can’t or shouldn’t.  It is a choice. We choose to leap before we look or fire without aiming.  Satan still wins!  We still lose! Impulsiveness flows out of a heart of willfulness.  If we really think about it, impulsiveness is one of the worst excuses because it is truly admitting, “I did not think.” One who does not think is ignorant, immature or foolish.  Not on the list is: justified. 

Daresh is not impulsive. It is intentional.  It diligently seeks out to find something specific.  David was seeking out how he could have what he wanted to have and do what he wanted to do.

·      Warning #5: Seek and you will find.

We usually associate “seek and you will find” with Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount where Jesus spoke practical truths to the masses hungry to hear from this miracle worker.  Matthew 7:7-11 “Seek and you will find” is a wonderful promise when it comes to things from God! What a huge warning when it doesn’t.

He who diligently seeks good seeks favor, but he who seeks evil, evil will come to him.  Proverbs 11:27

This proverb consists of seven poignant words: shachar tov baqash ratzon; darash ra’a bo’.
o   Shachar tov = to diligently search for what is good, well-pleasing, morally correct, proper.
o   Baqash ratzon = is trying to obtain or looking for what is a delightful, desirable, and/or acceptable, especially by God. 
Ø If you are diligently searching for what is truly good, what you are actually looking for is what is a delight to God.
o   Darash ra’a  = to investigate thoroughly and pursue ruthlessly what is not right or good (at whatever degree)
o   Bo’ = brings to that place. 
Ø On the other hand, if you are trying to figure out how to justify or do what isn’t right, you are going to end up smack in the middle of wrong.

What you diligently pursue is going to be what you find.  You will keep looking until you find it.  If it is having what we want to have and doing what we want to do, we will find it. 

Jesus invites us to ask Him for what we want.  We are told in 2 Peter 1:3 that He has already “granted to us everything pertaining to life and godliness.”   The promise in Matthew 7:11 is that your Father will give what is good to those who ask Him.  Why don’t we ask? We don’t ask because we already know it isn’t good. That in itself is a warning.

·      Warning #6:  If you cannot ask God for it, you know you should NOT have or do it.

When our gut says “no,” we should recognize this as a temptation.  It might be a really powerful enticing temptation, but it is JUST a temptation. It may feel very physical or emotional, but it is really only in our minds.  It is not something we HAVE to have or do. Does that perspective make a difference? Those thoughts can take our mind and body captive or we can take captive those thoughts. (2 Corinthians 10:5)

·      Warning #7: Temptation only controls us if we let it.

Once we recognize this temptation is all in our head, the next step is to either align it with what we want or what Christ wants. Have you experienced the power to endure temptation, despite its lingering draw and possibility, simply by realigning your thoughts with Christ? It really does work.  However, the longer we allow the temptation to have a grip on our desires and draw us into searching out how to fulfill it, the harder it is to recognize that it i­s a temptation. We become numb bums! Justifications numb us to recognizing something as a temptation. The more we justify, the further we withdraw from the Spirit’s conviction. Remember, He will not get louder nor move away from truth.

When it comes to temptation, what should we be investigatively searching for? According to 1Corinthians 10:13, we need to be looking for the provided “way of escape.” We would all love it to be an Acts 12 experience where the chains fall off and the doors fly open. The temptation suddenly vanishes.  But the fact that it has to be endured tells us it isn’t going anywhere.  Yet, we are promised a way of escape. We need to give time, energy and intent in finding what God willingly provides and employing it.  It may be a Scripture, the support of a specific friend, discernment, or the power to simply say “no.”  The Lord knows exactly what escape is best for each and every temptation. Ask the Holy Spirit to open your eyes, ears and heart to recognize it, and His empowering to apply it.

The dictionary defines “escape” as breaking free from confinement or control; succeed in avoiding or eluding something dangerous.  Rather than the alluring, exciting, fulfilling, satisfying and empowering that Satan misleadingly promises them to be, we need to see that those tempting desires to have or do what we want as confining, controlling and dangerous.  When we see them for what they truly are, they lose their lure.

What was David’s way of escape when he noticed a woman bathing?  The door!  But now he has sent a servant or two to scope out all he could find out about this woman.  What is his escape now?  The door! This time he needed to close it. “Never mind! I don’t need to know.” Why is this now harder? He had involved others. Now it is about image and pride.      

·      Warning #8: Make sure those we involve are helping us avoid temptation not fall into it.

I am not blaming the servants. They did what they were asked. At possible great risk, one actually tried to dissuade David from his foolish pursuit.

So David sent and inquired about the woman. And one said, “Is this not Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam, the wife of Uriah the Hittite?”  2 Samuel 11:3

I’m not sure what other information they provided David, such as address, age, maybe even measurements, but the really important facts were clearly stated: she was the daughter of Eliam and the wife of Uriah the Hittite.  She is someone’s daughter, and even more importantly, someone’s wife!

·      Warning #9: Hear what you are being told, not just for what you want to hear.

I am not sure who Eliam was. There is an Eliam listed among David’s might men (2 Samuel 23:34), who is cross-referenced to this verse in 2 Samuel 11. What matters is David knew Eliam. Even if he didn’t, being told that she was someone’s daughter means she is not something to objectify. She is a person, someone who matters.  David was a father. He had at least one daughter, probably more. If nothing else, see her from a father’s perspective.  Take a hint!

She was also married. Off limits! Taken! Married to someone we know was one of David’s mighty men and valiant soldiers.  Respect her for the sake of one whom he respected. Take a hint!

These servants did not have the authority to tell David what to do or not to do, but they saw where he was going with this. Their question was meant to be a deterrent.  They had to feel like Jeremiah when they saw on his face that he wasn’t really hearing him.

I’ve got something to say. Is anybody listening?   I’ve a warning to post. Will anyone notice?  It’s hopeless! Their ears are stuffed with wax — deaf as a post, blind as a bat.  It’s hopeless! They’ve tuned out GOD.   They don’t want to hear from me. Jeremiah 6:10 MSG

What do you think David wanted to hear? Who she was and where he could find her. What do you think David heard in the warning that she was Uriah’s wife? Not home – gone for a guaranteed period – won’t know – works for ME – can!  What happens when we filter what we hear through willfulness? We hear what we want to hear and do what we want to do. 

Willfulness is surprisingly powerful.  David wasn’t known for being willful, but for some reason this was one of those times.

For David had lived an exemplary life before GOD all his days, not going off on his own in willful defiance of GOD’S clear directions (except for that time with Uriah the Hittite). 1 Kings 15:5 MSG

·      Warning #10:  Willfulness is a choice. No one is exempt from having to make the choice or the consequences when they don’t

Make that choice enough times and it will become a habit. But even then, each time it is a choice – it just gets easier to make.  Let me borrow a question from Jesus …

Jesus replied, “You too? Are you being willfully stupid?  Matthew 15:16 MSG

What does “willfully stupid” mean to you?  To me it means “I know better, but I don’t want … to think about it … listen … make the hard choice … act like a grown up.

Be on the alert, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong. Let all that you do be done in love.   1 Corinthians 16:13,14

How much foolishness would you avoid if you simply applied this counsel?  In this verse alone God has provided five escape routes!

David was being willfully stupid.  He wanted what he wanted. There was no one but God to stop him, he was willfully tuning out God.  He could, so he did. The Hebrew verbs used in 2 Samuel 11:4 all express power and authority.

David sent messengers and took her, and when she came to him, he lay with her;  2 Samuel 11:4a

This act of authority is not as evident in the NIV translation.

Then David sent messengers to get her. She came to him, and he slept with her. 2 Samuel 11:4a NIV

  • Sent – shalach– commission with a specific task.  The ones David sent were mal’akh – official representatives. There was no question who they represented.  Note “messengers.” They were not going to deliver an engraved invitation, but to make sure she came. They were sent on a specific mission empowered by the king.
  • Took her – laqash – to grasp or seize a person, animal or object. This does not necessarily indicate violently, but a firm, unquestioned possession.  She wasn’t necessarily “man-handled,” but they could and would if she did not “cooperate.”
  •  She came – bo’ -  to be brought or come to a certain place.   Do you think she had a choice?


This is definitely different then portrayed in stories, books and movies. To be honest, when I looked at my own old notes I read: “She had to know the king’s private patio looked down into her courtyard. She was careless, foolish and apparently lacked the usual Hebrew modesty. She set herself up as a stumbling block.”  All these assumptions made her complicit rather than a victim. Why do we want to blame her? We want to assume complicity, because it makes our hero less tainted. She had to bring out the “willfully stupid” in him. It had to be her fault.  No!  Actually, it doesn’t matter.

·      Warning #11: Blaming others does not absolve us of the choices we make.

I do not know if Bathsheba played a willing part in this or not. In the context of the culture where women had few, if any, rights, I sincerely doubt it. But, that really isn’t the issue here. This is about David, and he was wrong. He used his authority, position, power and resources to get what he wanted: sex with Bathsheba.  Slept with her” NIV – “went to bed with her” MSG – “lay with her” NASB all sound better than rape.  We can sugar coat what we call it, but it is still sin.

Blame not only shifts the focus away from ourselves, keeping us from seeing our own sinful choices in the matter, it thwarts change. You won’t change what you can blame on someone or something else.

There is one last part of verse 4.

 … and when she had purified herself from her uncleanness, she returned to her house. 2 Samuel 11:4b

The Message has a unique perspective on this: “This occurred during the time of “purification” following her period.” The purpose of this note would be to make sure we knew that she was not pregnant going into this encounter.  However, I’m afraid it has a much deeper meaning.  The word “purified” is a very religious term.

Leviticus 15:18 requires that both the man and the woman bathe after intercourse

If a man lies with a woman so that there is a seminal emission, they shall both bathe in water and be unclean until evening. Leviticus 15:18

This was more than just take a bath, wash away the evidence and it is all undone. It doesn’t work that way.  Putting a religious spin on it makes it worse instead of better. We can’t pick and choose obedience. Obey this and it makes up for not obeying that.  Washing their bodies may take care of the outside, but it doesn’t do a thing for what is going on inside.

·      Warning #12: There is no easy fix for falling for temptation.

Doing religious things to make-up for disobedience is not a remedy.  Going to church, taking communion, participating in confession, giving more time or money, being more devote in the what looks and feels like being “Christian” deceive us into thinking we have evened the score. Being religious or sacrificial will not take care of the problem.

Saul tried to do the same thing. Listen to Samuel’s reply:

But Samuel replied:  “Does the LORD delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices as much as in obeying the voice of the LORD?    To obey is better than sacrifice, and to heed is better than the fat of rams. 1 Samuel 15:22 NIV

When David looked back at this event in his life, he realized this truth.

The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise. Psalm 51:17 NIV

God is interested in what is going on in the heart.  The purpose of this washing instruction was for their well-being, but also to remind them to think about God in the process.  It the cleansing of true confession that God desires. 

If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9

Soak me in your laundry and I’ll come out clean, scrub me and I’ll have a snow-white life.  Psalm 51:7 MSG

When we take care of the outside without treating the inside, it is like putting a bandage over a dirty wound.  We actually enhance the environment that promotes the infection to grow. We may deceive ourselves for a season, but never God.  He loves us too much to let us get away with it.

Then it happened,” David was “carried away and enticed by his own lust. Then when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death.  (James 1:14, 15)  Unfortunately, David takes a deeper dive into sin before he finally makes his way to the surface gasping for grace.  But we do not have to follow.

For whatever was written in earlier times was written for our instruction, so that through perseverance and the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope.  Romans 15:4

All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness;  2 Timothy 3:16

Let’s heed the warning discovered as we study David’s plunge into willfulness.

Here is a recap of the warning flags regarding temptation:
  1.  We are just one simple justification away from falling into temptation.
  2. As soon as we set ourselves apart or above others we are asking for trouble.
  3. You linger; you lose.
  4. We are not as ignorant or as innocent as we try to convince ourselves we are.
  5.  Seek and you will find.
  6. If you cannot ask God for it, you know you shouldn’t have or do it.
  7. Temptation only controls us if we let it.
  8.  Make sure those we involve are helping us avoid temptation not fall into it.
  9.  Hear what you are told, not just what you want to hear.
  10. Willfulness is a choice. No one is exempt from having to make the choice or the consequences when they don’t.
  11. Blaming others does not absolve us of the choices we make.
  12. There is no easy fix for falling for temptation.

   Let’s end with a few pinpoint questions:
  • Has looking at the dynamics of temptation changed your perspective on temptation(s)? If so, in what way?
  • Which specific warning(s) do you feel will help most to “lead you not into temptation, but deliver you from evil” (Matthew 6:13)?
  • Why must you take this lesson and these warnings exceptionally seriously?